druNAsty

人

2008-03-20T00:33:00.000+08:00

人,

人每天都很忙,

忙生存,

忙掙錢,

忙達到目的,

太趕了,

有誰嘗試過放慢腳步把四週看清楚?

可能你想要的其實就在你身邊而已.

Life

2008-03-19T19:35:00.001+08:00

Life has definitely gotten much more challenging as the days go by ... Guess gone are the good old days where one wakes up to birds chirping and breakfast permeating the air.

Not a single moment pass without decisions being made and problems being solved.

Am i living life ... or just merely living ?

决定

2008-03-06T19:46:00.000+08:00

我拚命追求幸福的想法一句话一个动作一个细节
都希望
你能够会发现我的存在想要给你我傻傻的爱

我始终握住幸福的钥匙一行泪一个眼神一丝微笑
都希望
你能够会了解爱的存在决定给你我满满的爱

走调的钢琴忧郁的声音空心的吉他孤单的旋律
别让爱孤寂暂停了呼吸凝结的空气有你的气息

想告诉你我多在乎你你是我的决定
不用言语我们的默契只要用心去聆听

想告诉你我多在乎你你是我的决定
暧昧游戏不适合维系说好要陪你相约厮守在一起

jealousy kills

2008-02-15T02:35:00.001+08:00

I always wonder...
do i not give people any sense of security ?
do i really give the impression to people that i'm not serious ?

i don't know why. someone that liked me and i had a very good impression of that person ... we started talking to each other for some time and then started to tell that likes me ... everything went perfect. conversations and everything was perfect but not until one day, things that i really dislike started and never ends.

i don't understand -
-how can i go out with my friends for drinks it makes you jealous.
-how that it matters whether i go out in a group of friends or just 1 friend makes you jealous?
-how that i left my computer and msn on and felt asleep and couln't reply ur msg makes you upset
-how that i said i might not be going out but in the end i went out makes you jealous.
- and etc.

do i really give that impression that i'm not serious and making u feel insecure? it just made things from good turn to bad... everything was perfect like i said ... but u made things worse by controlling and getting jealous easily before things even get serious between us ...

it just makes me wonder ...
if things really worked out between us and we got together ... i couldn't imagine how the relationship will be like and how it will end up ...

in the end all i could say is *sigh*

也许有一天

2008-01-21T15:37:00.000+08:00

to someone ...

也许有一天我会爱上你
也许有一天我们在一起
也许有一天等一个也许
也许有一天我们都忘记

如果一切都会过去不如留点回忆
当我看着你的眼睛我等的是奇迹

也许有一天你会想起我
也许有一天我们都忘记

就算一切都会过去还是应该相信
当你睁开你的眼睛看一看我的心

寂寞

2007-10-04T09:02:00.000+08:00

人,
其实是很难做的,
也是一种很难明白的生物.

虽然笑容满面,
可是却不让任何人靠近,
也不和任何人扯上关系.
虽然这样子到现在过的还好,
但是,
有时候当自己一个人时,
也会觉得寂寞,孤独.....
甚至有时会问回自己为何要这样呢?
为何要把自己搞得这样呢?
面对难题或不开心时,
又不知要找谁诉苦,
也不想让人担心.
做人真的好难.
反而有时候不开心时会希望朋友能告诉我,
"如果你不想说的话,
可以不用说.但是,
在你不想笑的时候...
用不着笑.
有时候也要以自我为重."

其实,今天也不知自己搞什么?
可能今天一整天都自己过吧?
头脑乱想.

conclusion 就是做人难!!

whoa!

2007-07-18T12:23:00.000+08:00

So, I do know it has been ages since i last updated my blog but there's reasons to it ... firstly due to my computer which decides to die on me then also my laziness that's stopping me from blogging. hahaha

A lot of things happened ... let me briefly write out so in future when i'm old and dumb i could at least remember in the past what had i done !!

- I resigned from TopShop and basically went jobless for almost 3 months but then in between those time obviously i went back to freelance events. Started working permanently in Jimmy Choo now. The worse part was that when I'm jobless no one calls me even my cv is out. But when i started my new job i'm receiving loads of phone calls for job offers and interviews. WTF is this???

- I basically gonna turn into an alcoholic or drunkard. Drinking minimum of 3 times a week. damn the belly and damn the freaking-forever-taste-so-good-and-delicious beer!!!

- I have like 4 friends wedding dinner to attend from month of July till November but i heard that i'm gonna get somemore invites ! arghhh ...... =(

- Went Malacca jongker street and got broke there. Trust me the things there are fantastic and freaking cheap. So as the food ... damn ... i'm hungry even by talking about it now .... i even miss the roasted duck that i ate in sabah ... *slurp*

- My dog gave up hope on me already. Last time whenever i'm home they'd come and greet me. Since then i started drinking frequently and sometimes come home a little high ... they started to ignore me. Although i hope they actually ignore me so that they wont wake my mum up but even in the morning or afternoon they still ignore me. i think my mom brainwashed them.

A lot more had happened but i would need sometime to sort it out. so while sorting i would probably go down and play with my ps2.

laters

2007-02-14T00:14:00.000+08:00

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

have a great one people and hope your relationship last long and have a blasting valentine's!!!!

i'm celebrating valentine's alone !!! sob sob =(

the day

2007-02-12T22:56:00.000+08:00

the day has arrived.

i handed in my resignation today. will see wut my manager has to say tomorrow but i kinda have the feeling nothing will happened.

was kinda happy and relieved after handing in the letter. went yum char with kit then came home. So anyone has any job offers for any kinda job please let me know ya !!!! =P

Decided to take a month off then head to KK and BKK for holz.

wooOooOOhHhHoooooOoo .... can't wait ... counting down !!!!!!!

hrmmm

2007-02-12T00:25:00.000+08:00

i dreamt that i died and no one realised ....

again ....

.........................................

2007-01-30T23:50:00.000+08:00

my daily routine ....

monday : work
tuesday : work
wednesday : work
thursday : work
friday : work
saturday : work
sunday : work

how to blog laaaaa ??? also, how to enjoy life also laaaa ???? when i'm going to off also i dont know ... off also no one is free to even bother about me and go out yum char or club or have fun with me ... my life is boring ...

arghhhhhh

Closer To The Sky

2007-01-12T04:50:00.000+08:00

You can try, you can try,
To build a fortress in your mind,
Try to stack up all your things so high,
You can try, you can try,
To climb away from this life,
But it will only bring you closer to the sky

Some people think that life is worth living for tomorrow,
Some people think that life is worth living for today,
Some people think that life is worth nothing but sorrow,
Some people think that life is worth living day by day

Michael Franti - Closer to the Sky

say, what do you think about your life then ?

鑰匙

2007-01-12T00:32:00.000+08:00

一把堅實的大鎖掛在大門上，一根鐵桿費了九牛二虎之力，

還是無法將它撬開。

鑰匙來了，他瘦小的身子鑽進鎖孔，只輕輕一轉，

那大鎖就「啪」地一聲打開了。

鐵桿奇怪地問：「為什麼我費了那麼大力氣也打不開，

而你卻輕而易舉地就把它打開了呢？」

鑰匙說：「因為我最了解他的心。」

(每個人的心，都像上了鎖的大門，任你再粗的鐵棒也撬不開。
唯有關懷，才能把自己變成一隻細膩的鑰匙，
進入別人的心中，了解別人。) ............

yea right !

2007-01-11T21:28:00.000+08:00

We always hear people explain things by "everything happens for a reason! look at the bright side!"

me answer to that is "yeah right!!! my ASS" ... what reason?? tell me !!!

There are things that kept happening on me and i do not know why and what's the reason behind it!! Not only once but tons of time. urgh ... i just hate life sometimes.

------
Was suppose to go to the loft yesterday but didn't make it. Ended up reached home at 7 and slept like a pig till this morning. Now i feel tired again and it's only 9:32! am i getting old or what ? time pass by fast and yet i'm still where i am and i think i should start to make a move in my life.

decisions decisions decisions ... hate it !!!!!! why can't life just be as simple as Paris Hilton's ?????

2007-01-04T02:19:00.000+08:00

found this on my old old blog and tot it was meaningful !!!

i sit here alone,
surrounded by walls and buildings,
i recall back the times we had around here.
i started to weep
as the loneliness in me now is so strong.
i wonderwhy i have to be alone all the time.
but at this very down moment,
you came and told me"you're not alone, you still have me ---- your friend"
i stood and smile"yes i do, yes i still have you ---- my friend !"
we walked with smile hanging on our faces.

thank you my friend !! for all the happiness you guys gave and for holding me when i'm down. thanks !

2007-01-04T02:12:00.000+08:00

Depression isn’t trying to get over somebody. Depression isn’t because you don’t have the coolest clothes on the street. Depression isn’t because you don’t have enough money to buy what you want. Depression is when you give off love and there is no one to return it. Depression is when you have no one there to back you up. Depression is when you have NO support for the things you love to do from your family and friends. Depression is when you stand alone. Stay true to yourself. Live and let live. But don’t worry if sometime you get into other people’s business, you’re just doing what you do and if they don’t like it FUCK Them!. If they have a problem, tell them to deal with it. Because if they’re not going to change or realize why you do what you do, they’re lost and you’re learning. GOOD FOR YOU!

mistakes

2007-01-02T21:24:00.000+08:00

people do make mistakes. so do i.

i made a huge mistake that i actually felt embarassed and guilty now. not gonna mention wut happened but yea ... i'm depressed now ...

depressed ....

damn

2006-12-28T01:46:00.000+08:00

someone i suddenly missed talking to is in taiwan.

and i just found out that earthquake happened in taiwan.

now i'm worried and hope that person would call me soon ...

hrmm

2006-12-28T00:54:00.000+08:00

there ...

"it's an opportunity" - my answer to that was yes it is but will end up suffering
"do you see the future ??" - my answer is no
"why not find a solution?" - i did but you ignored my suggestions.

there. for nearly half an hour i was asked those question and yet they do not want to come out with a solution for me and insists on me going to 1U. which i rejected continuously 2 days and yet they want me to think over it again and give my answer by monday or sooner.

don't you just understand what does the word NO means ??? i repeated it so many times and repeated why i do not want to go over but why still insist on me going ?

idiots

hate it

2006-12-24T02:59:00.000+08:00

i hate it when people are so insonciderate. i'm a christian and you're not. i celebrate christmas and you're not but you do not allow me to work in the morning nor off on the 24th but you yourself had an offday on that day. the next thing is you even ignored my request to work in the morning instead of afternoon on the 25th. what the fark wei ...

there i'm getting annoyed and frustrated over it and the next thing is i found out they have plans for me to transfer back to 1U in another brand. what the FUCK !!!! i blardee complained and went through heaps to get transfer out from 1U and there i'm being asked to go to 1U for 6 months. i'll just wait and see what the fuck you have to talk to me in order to manipulate me to go over to 1U you biatches!!!!

arghhh life is just so irritating. everything doesn't seem to be going the right way these few months. arghhh .... hate it hate it ... ma hai ... urgh !!! life sux to the max at the moment!!!!

=( =( =(

hrmmm ...

2006-12-17T04:26:00.000+08:00

i wonder ...

how
to respond when someone u knew for quite sometime suddenly tell u he/she likes u ...

how
would u respond when you realise u have a stalker that knows where you work and where you stay and knows what you normally wear ....

how
to respond to people who likes you but you know you're not interested in them ...

how
to respond to someone that likes you but you do not know whether you like him/her ...

i'm confused now ... ish !!!! grrrrrrrrrrrr ..................

pathetic

2006-12-16T00:58:00.000+08:00

you'd know how pathetic and lonely you are ..

when
you go through your handphone to find someone to talk to when you are sad but you can't find anyone ...

when
you go online to find someone to talk to when you are down but you can't seem to find anyone to talk to ...

when
you finally found someone that you know you could talk to but at the same time you know he/she is busy with his/her things that you do not want to disturb

when
you have to write stuff here cause you can't find anyone to talk to ...

that's how i feel right now ... =(

today ..

2006-12-11T01:59:00.000+08:00

Today, woke up at 7 and met up with Andrea at 7.45a.m. to leave to Mid Valley as I had to open the shop for a shoot by channel [V] ...

There you see ignorant people who thought the world revolves around her just because she won the competition and being so not co-operative and lastly a Biatch! wake up woman !!!! Look at the freaking mirror and be more humble!!! Sometimes, humans are so ignorant and arrogant. Damn. Well, overall the shoot was ok just that i didn't even know there was a competition going on and the winnder actually get to take away outfits as prizes ! damn. So as Andrea... all of us know shits about this... interesting.

After work got home to rest and wanted to go out for a drink later at night. At the time when i came back to have my sneses back then I realised i felt asleep and the time was 12.45. To make things worse, i have 48 missed calls since 8p.m. and 25 sms. fark wei ...

No choice but to apologize to everyone and i'm stuck at home with nothing to do. damn freaking hungry and ordered Mcdonald's delivery. wtf ... what happened to my diet plan ??? it's all ruined !!!! i'm so not gonna be thin again !!! =(

It's raining outside.
It reminds me of the times when i'm not working and not doing anything. Up awake at wee hours of the night listening to music and do nothing. Also reminds me of the happy times i used to have last time and also reminds me of the sad times i had during rainy days. Sometimes i do enjoy listening to the sound of rain and the scent after the rain has done with their puring of pee all over the world. hrmm ... time flies fast eh ? and seriously it doesn't wait. I start to feel old and i start to miss all those times that i had last time. I missed hanging around with all my closed friends and the wee hours of the night. Now all of them are all over the world. I missed the time that i do not need to worry about working for money and jsut stay home and do nothing. I missed the time that i'm able to go out for some beer sessions with my friends and have some fun. I missed my grandfather !!

Now i think i need Andrea to talk to me with her bimbo tone to make me laugh ... . hhahahhaaa ...

gotta hit the hay now ... the rain made me "emo" today ... and i'm writing shit here ... hahahaa

2006-12-06T02:24:00.000+08:00

you know what is annoying?

guys who ride motocycles that look like cop bikes while wearing "uniformish" clothing with a white helmet.

hrmm ....

2006-11-24T20:52:00.000+08:00

It seems that everyone and their mama now has an online journal documenting their lives. This is true for many of my high school classmates.. I find it quite interesting and perhaps I should update here as well. Now.. if I can only get people to come back and read.

....

2006-11-14T18:10:00.000+08:00

The reason you don't have a bf/gf is because you do not want one! If you had one it would challenge the well established opinions you have of yourself. As a worthless sack of shit that nobody wants.

Therefore you go after guys/girls you know will reject you, then you stand around here and bitch like a high school girl.

When in fact, you've gotten exactly what you want ...

... Mainly nothing

MCC

2006-11-06T00:22:00.000+08:00

today ... *sigh* i gave in to the MCC-ness in me to take over me. Reached kimgary for breakfast and as i asked for the bill i realised i left my wallet at home. So what's next ?? what happens when you finish eating and have no money to pay. tried calling people to help and apparently those who i have their number are working in the afternoon not morning. none picked up the call. Well, in the end, God sent an angel to rescue me. *grins*. i'm kinda glad that not everyone hates Andrew as one of the waiter offered to pay for me first. haha. Thanks Elvin!

As for lunch, i managed to loan some money from Kit for my lunch! *phew* or else you'd see me starve to dead in my shop with flies around me loitering around. Work was boring and there you'll see what boredom gets Andrew doing. To be bored to the max i was exercising while working. making jokes and laugh like a mad farting skunk. To leave at 630 and saying bye bye to the rest was nice and fun *evil*

had dinner then home and do nothing and i'm bored again. I just get bored easily. don't I? damn. need a life wei ... someone save me please !!! =(

piggin` out

2006-11-05T01:13:00.000+08:00

so yea i've gotta admit that i've been piggin` out lately that i didn't blog for ... hrmm ... *thinks* a few months i guess ? well, so here i am again. back to blog as i'm bored ! *urgh*

so what had happened to me in these few months ?? let's see...

1. i've been transferred to 1 Utama.
2. had a bastard ASM.
3. tender in my resignation after working for 2 weeks.
4. on my last day had a huge arguement with my ASM and left work half way.
5. called by GM to resume work.
6. and now i'm back in Mid Valley

well, it was kinda a big thing when i left and resumed after 2 weeks. Yea, probably you could just guessed as much. In my company, people's mouths are just like CNN. create rumours and spread and make u look like shit. Before i resume job i already heard people saying that i went and complain to the GM that's why i got back the job. Then there you hear people saying cuz i had good relationships with all the merchandisers and they backed me up so i got my job back and so on and forth.

To be honest, those who knew me long enough knows that i'd been longing to leave this company and get a better pay job as this company seriously underpaid me. *grr* I was fooled by this mini-big-ass-giant that my pay was the highest and this and that. all the shit she told me was just something to "bomo" me to do things for her so that she can get what she wants. As soon i've done all i could i was transferred to other brand. talking bout realistic. now i see what it is like. Taking my baby away from me and later on talk shit about me behind and in front of me. To be very honest as soon as i left on that day i felt relieved and happy. As though i've just thrown away tonnes from my shoulders. But i was convinced by my GM to give it another go and so i did. and yea i'm getting all this shit but heck it as i'm not working for them by the way.

Upon starting in Mid valley a few weeks i realised i've been duped by my area manager. saying that my days that i wasn't working would be considered unpaid leave till i get my pay slip i realised it was all considered ABSENT. WTF la ... if absent so many days then i already got fired right? called up HQ and they tell me mine's a special case and don't need to worry about it! wtf again la ...

well, got offers from CK, Tommy Hilfiger, Polo, Forever 21 and Renoma recently ... still considering but i'm still more interested in office jobs. *argh* suggestions anyone ???

it's late and i'm gonna open my shop tomorrow. Manager wants to test my punctuality and yet i'm still here blogging at these wee hours of the night. wtf! blame it all on my cute piggy for eating at chili's. still can feel the burger up my throat. *burp*

damn ... life's tough ! *grr* bark at it baby ! *talking shit* *mumbling*

知道吗?

2006-06-26T01:09:00.000+08:00

你知道吗?
我可是多么的关心你...

你知道吗?
不知是爱还是喜欢的感觉是多么辛苦?

你知道吗?
爱你也不知怎么说是多么的辛苦?

你知道吗?
关心也不知如何表达是多么辛苦?

你知道吗?
我可是多么的关心和但心你?

你知道吗?
你知道我心要的什么吗?

你到底知道吗?
你知道吗?

Lonely

2006-06-25T00:02:00.000+08:00

Been going to and back from work by myself very frequent these days.

In the cab looking out the window, seeing the cars that drove past and etc. It actually makes you think a lot.

You can always see the playful/cheerful/bitchy/the-non-stop-laughing-machine guy while work or whatsoever but ... still ...
I feel lonely at times.

Maybe i should rephrase it -

I feel lonely

Forgetting ...

2006-06-24T03:11:00.000+08:00

In our life,
We do not need or intend to remember every person who walk through our life
or every single thing that happened in our life.

Where as when you intend to forget something,
it always happens to be something that stays in your heart.

The truth is,
learning to forget is harder than learning to remember.

Way harder...

Enough

2006-06-21T20:48:00.000+08:00

Ok... i've had enough !!! working life is just getting worse with such area manager!! how on earth did such person was borne? how on earth did such people even exist in this world. this is ridiculous !!!
-you f*cking invite yourself to our dinner.
-you f*cking plan another dinner with our reward for winning the best store award and you f*cking invite yourself to the dinner again.
-you f*cking call me brainless for doing such thing when you're the one who asked me to do it this way
-you f*cking say i have bad organization skills when you're the one who organizes it
-you f*cking take all the credits of my hardwork as yours and say i'm not performing
-you f*cking say all my work are shit
-you f*cking say it's your work when someone praises my work
-you f*cking gave me empty promises to make me stay in this blardee shop so u can take all the credits
-you f*cking bitch !
-f*cking fat ass bitch!!
-f*cking BITCH!!

bah im done with my state of anger. bah i'm cool now! hahahhahaa call me mean or a bitch i dun care but till u work with her u'd understand how frustrated am i ! am going out for dinner now... wooohooo see ya

我真的受傷了

2006-06-21T00:15:00.000+08:00

燈光也暗了　
音樂低聲了
口中的棉花糖也融化了
窗外阴天了　人是無聊了

我的心開始想你了

電話響起了　
你要說話了
還以為你心裡對我又想念了
怎麼你聲音變得冷淡了

是你變了　是你變了

燈光熄滅了　
音樂靜止了
滴下的眼淚已停不住了
天下起雨了　人是不快樂
我的心真的受傷了

我的心真的受傷了

如果的事

2006-06-20T23:05:00.000+08:00

如果你已經不能控制每天想我一次
如果你因為我而誠實
如果你看我的電影聽我愛的CD
如果你能帶我一起旅行

如果你決定跟隨感覺為愛勇敢一次
如果你說我們有彼此
如果你會開始相信這般戀愛心情
如果你能給我如果的事

我只要你一件如果的事

有时

2006-06-12T20:53:00.000+08:00

有时侯,
觉得自己好孤独...
仿佛没朋友一样...
朋友,
真的是朋友吗?
他们能在你最最需要一个肩膀依靠时,
他们真的会在吗?
朋友真的那么重要吗?
他们真的是你朋友吗?
说真的,
东西还没发生就是很好的朋友...
到了某种地步当你最最需要他们时,
你才会知道谁才是你朋友...
或者你才会发现你根本没朋友...

我本身可说朋友不多...
有时反而享受自己一个人过,
一个人烦要烦的事,
一个人吃想吃的东西,
一个人做想做的事,
一个人去想去的地方,
一个人静静的生活..
一个人反而会觉的活的根自由根快乐.

最经开始变的好冷漠,
好冷淡的对待人了...

我也不知道为什么....

看开...

2006-06-12T02:10:00.000+08:00

要怎样忘记你的脸庞.
要怎样才能不遗憾
遗失的感觉
要如何才不会重燃
应该要忘记你的
没必要遗憾什么
心真的死了
就算遇见了你
也能大方笑着

一个人

2006-06-12T01:14:00.000+08:00

甚麼時候開始
變得不想講話,
不想見人,
不想交朋友,
不想笑
變得享受一個人,
喜歡一個人吃飯,
一個人去自己喜歡的地方,
一個人靜靜的生活

My Birthday

2006-06-10T01:45:00.000+08:00

Went to cafe flam on the 8th to celebrate my birthday with Cheryl, Yao, Kamini and Kayti but ended up with more than what i expected. Came Willie then Mervyn. We started off with 8 jugs of beers than Willie got me a jug of Long Island then the girls got me a flaming lambo then Mervyn got me a jug of Sex on the Beach (?). Followed by free flow of dewars when i went inside flam and found Alvin, Wan Lu and Kelvin.

Conclusion: i got fcuking pissed drunk and i couldn't wake up the second day for work. Reached work right on the dot but ended up working half day due to my massive hangover.

Scenes: It was a great scene for Cheryl and Yao as they were looking at me puking into the bucket of mop-water. Then today while working ran to toilet to puke all the water i drank in the morning. Darn!

Well, it was a blast that night and I was indeed very happy!! ho ho ho. The night was more like a catch up session and a reunion for Kayti, Yao, Mervyn, Willie and I(CIMP-ians). Also the catch up session for the JB people. It was fun and I'm still thinking what made us left. I remembered every single detail of what happened, what i drank, how i went home and all but i just couldn't recall why we left. hrmm .... Thanks to all of you who celebrated with me !!! Thanks a lot ! I really appreciated it and you guys wouldn't know how much this means to me ... =) thanks a lot ...

Disclaimer: I will not considered myself drunk. I would say i was very High. I'm serious i wan't drunk! =Pspan>

the group that gave me my massive hangover!
L - R : Me, Cheryl, Kamini, Kayti and Yao

Willie and I

The Gift From the Girls

The Drinks

The Birthday Kiss from Kayti and Cheryl

3 Of us ... After Such a long long time.

The birthday Kiss

The Reunion! *my fcuked up lan c face due to alcohol!

My Birthday Dinner

The only Birthday present that i got! *I bought it for myself though! =P

Well, I really did enjoyed and was very happy. Thank you guys so much for everything! =) *hugs*